Satan to set up outpost in sand trap

A GATEWAY to hell has been found in the bunker of a Rhyl-on-Sea golf course.
Neil Llandundno, 12, normally plays the 18 hole course 20 under par but last Thursday found himself in difficulties when his ball went into a previously unknown hazard.
"I was playing badly on the 13th hole," revealed Mr Llandudno. "I was 150 yards from the green when I managed to slice the ball into the corner of a bunker that hadn't been there a moment before.
"I thought it was a little bit odd when flames erupted from the spot where it had landed, so I went over to see what had happened."
But as Mr Llandudno pushed his 45 club titanium set over to the mysterious bunker, he noticed that all was not as it had seemed.
"Not only was there smoke issuing from the ground, but I could also hear what sounded an awful lot like the screams of the damned. "As I got close, the flames and smoke started to form into a figure. I thought I recognised it - it was the devil."
Excited, Mr Llandudno was anxious to know what Lucifer was doing on a Rhyl-on-Sea golf course.
"I thought that perhaps he wanted to buy my soul in return for riches without number, the everlasting servitude of nubile houris and eternal life, but the truth was far more sinister" he said.

"The prince of darkness told me he wanted a go between to buy up the course and establish a luxury development of apartments retail outlets and a marina. "I just couldn't believe it - naturally, I told him I'd try to help, but really, unless he promised to build a new golf course elsewhere, I wasn't too enthusiastic about the whole thing."
Acting on the instructions of the Prince of Darkness, Mr Llandudno approached course manager Dave Dyserth with the proposals.
"There's no way in a million years I would sell up and let my beautiful course with its trout fishing stream and the most sandy dunes for miles become a residential retail development and I turned his Satanic Majesty down right away," said Mr Dyserth.
"However, I did agree that the armies of darkness could keep a permanent outpost just off the 13th - with a lease renegotiable after 18 months dependng on the number of lost souls who perish therein."
A spokesman for the county council said, "This is exactly the sort of thing we need to bring tourists into Rhyl-on-Sea.
"This is a perfect example of the council developing partnerships with agencies from other areas."